MondayMemo|Detail No.164| July 21, 2025

Hi there,

It’s Monday again, and we’re still on the journey of values. We started the month asking what your values really are. But today, we’re digging even deeper with a question that’s not often asked: Can you be emulated?

It’s one thing to talk about values, to say the right words and quote the right phrases. But real values, the ones that shape your life aren’t found in your status updates or your polished speeches. They show up in the raw, often uncomfortable moments of your day. They show up in the decisions you make when no one’s watching.

Let’s be honest many of us like to think we’re people of integrity, compassion, loyalty. But what happens when those values are tested? What do you do when it costs you something to stand by them?

Think of it. You say you’re honest, but do you ever add just a little zero to inflate the numbers? “It’s harmless,” you tell yourself. “Everyone does it.” But every time we bend the truth, even a little, we chip away at the very thing we claim to believe in. You say you’re responsible but how often have you borrowed something, be it money or a personal item, and quietly never returned it? Or maybe you delay returning it for so long that it becomes awkward so you pretend it never happened. These may seem small, but they say a lot.

You see, values don’t shout. They whisper. And if you’re not quiet enough to hear them, you’ll end up living by convenience instead of conviction. This is where it gets real: people are watching you. Not in a performative sense, but in the quiet corners of life. Younger siblings, colleagues, friends, they’re learning from your habits, not your hashtags. What are they picking up? What message does your lifestyle preach, without a single word spoken?

Here’s a truth that might unsettle you: character is more caught than taught. You can preach responsibility, but if you don’t repay loans, your actions teach something else. You can quote loyalty, but if you vanish when things get hard, you teach betrayal. You can post about peace, but if you’re quick to fight or gossip, your lifestyle contradicts your caption.

And we’ve all done it. We’ve all had those moments when our values were tested and we didn’t quite pass. That doesn’t mean we’re hypocrites. It means we’re human. But being human doesn’t excuse us from growth. Instead, it invites us to realign. To look in the mirror, acknowledge the gap, and choose better next time.

I once heard about a young Nigerian accountant who was pressured to “just add a zero” to an invoice. It would’ve been easy to do just one small zero, right? He was told it would be fixed next month. But something in him resisted. He couldn’t do it. He refused, even though it cost him his job. At the time, it felt like a loss. But later, one of the clients someone who had quietly observed his honesty offered him a new opportunity. A better one. With better pay. And more importantly, respect. Because even when it feels like no one’s watching, someone always is.

Your values may not give instant rewards, but they leave lasting impressions. They build trust with others and, even more importantly, with yourself. You sleep better when you’re aligned. You show up better when you’re not hiding. And eventually, your life becomes one you’d want someone else to model.

So this week, take some time to check in. Quietly. Honestly. If someone copied your financial behaviour, your conversations, your attitude toward people would they be learning integrity or excuses? If someone followed you around for a day, what would your choices say about who you really are?

Here’s a small challenge for the week: pick one area where you know you’ve not been living in full alignment with your values. Maybe you need to return that item you borrowed. Maybe you need to speak the truth you’ve been avoiding. Maybe you need to stop tweaking the truth, even just a little. Whatever it is, take one step to clean it up not to impress anyone, but because your integrity matters. And when you do, take a moment to journal it. How did it feel to choose alignment, even when it was uncomfortable? What did it teach you? What version of yourself are you shaping?

So here’s the question I’ll leave with you today: If the next generation lived like you, would the world be better or just more careful with words?

Let’s be people whose values can be lived, not just liked. Because that’s the kind of legacy that lasts.

Have a great week ahead.