A New Chapter— Gratitude and Reflections.

DETAILS/ DETAIL NO.12/ A New Chapter— Gratitude and Reflections

Today is my birthday.

… I actually had to look that up, lol. Isn’t it funny how the older you get, the more the years just kinda blend together? Some of you know what I mean — the rest of you will find out.

I’m always amazed and humbled by how much can shift in a year.

This has been, without a doubt, the most challenging time of my life (so far).

I learnt a lot this year — many times, the hard way — about myself, identity, career and relationships… Among Other Things.

The media tends to portray learning these life lessons as simple, beautiful epiphanies, pretty Wikpedia quotes and happily-ever-after experiences.

In reality, life’s most powerful lessons can only be learnt and understood through layers of pain, failure, humility and change.

An age really truly is just a number and I think society sets expectations for us to feel like we need to have something by a certain age or we should be something by a certain age or we should be something at this or that age— and I think that isn’t really true. It isn’t nice to pressure ourselves to feel like by this age this and that should be happening in my life, because what’s meant to be will be and there’s no time limit on the things you want to achieve. I‘m not in anyway saying you should be a mediocre.

As I personally turn the page into a new chapter of my life, I wanted to reflect on some of mine with you. Here’s the thing— blogging is fun because I always imagine my future kid(s)been able to see an online scrapbook of my life. So if anything, this could potentially be a cool post for my future kid(s) to read? Kind of like “oh Mom is dishing out some inspiring bars, cool!”

Here’s some of the most transformative, raw, difficult and perspective-changing lessons I’ve learnt in the last year:

1. YOU ARE GOING TO GET criticized NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO, SO DO YOUR THANG.

Honestly, this is number one for a reason. No matter where I’ve been in life, people have criticized me. If I had listened to every piece of negative feedback, I’d be like sitting in a dark cellar counting flies on the wall, drooling. We’ve all been criticized at one time or another. You gotta do what you gotta do, & either way someone, somewhere will have something to say. If you don’t want to be criticized, say nothing, do nothing, be nothing.

2. FAILURE IS THE MOST EFFECTIVE PATH TO SUCCESS.

We’re all stuck in our own heads — in this way, failure becomes beautiful. So don’t dull your pain, fear it or avoid it. Embrace it.

3. LET IT BE WHAT IT IS RATHER THAN WHAT YOU THINK IT SHOULD BE.

Stop spiraling. Stop scrolling. When you find yourself giving too much importance to something, break it down to what it really is.

We get so caught up in romanticizing a particular outcome only to become disappointed when things don’t pan out that way.

4. YOU CANNOT CHANGE PEOPLE.

This is PROBABLY THE HARDEST THING EVER FOR ME.

This year I’ve realized that ‘it is, what it is’. Me trying to control the situation & change people into something they’re not is counterproductive & pointless. It’s a waste of breath. People are who they are. This year I’ve become more accepting…especially because you never know the whole story. People are set in their ways for their own reasons.

5. THERE’S A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN GOOD FRIENDS, TRUE FRIENDS AND FRIENDLINESS.

Sometimes people you think are on

your side are not. Know your limit, to avoid chilled premium tears,lol.

6. SOMETIMES, YOU HAVE TO LEARN TO LOVE PEOPLE FROM A DISTANCE.

And respect the boundaries of those who need to do the same of you.

7. DIETS SUCK. A HEALTHY LIFESTYLE IS WHERE IT’S AT.

Yesssss, yesssss, yesssss. Sticking to healthy living, wellness remedies, green juice, weekly workouts, water, oils, herbs, clean foods, & good vibes is a long term, sustainable goal. Balance is key!

8. ENDINGS REALLY ARE NEW BEGINNINGS IN DISGUISE.

You’ll be uncomfortable with the uncertainty — it sucks — but this is where many of life’s most powerful, fulfilling moments are born.

9. YOU CAN CREATE (and live in) YOUR OWN TIME ZONE.

This isn’t a race. You’ll reach your milestones when you reach them — and that’s okay. You’re not early. You’re not late. You’re on your time. Get out of everyone else’s.

10. NO ONE IS GOING TO DO ANYTHING FOR YOU.

If you want something to happen, get off your ass & make it happen. Ok if I’m been honest, I asked my dad to add one of his life tips, so this was his addition. A fairy godmother isn’t going to come create a dream career for you because you went to an amazing college or university… Life is what you make of it. If you want to be a real estate agent, go for it. It’s not going to fall into your lap. Update that LinkedIn page, write that CV! If you want to be in a better relationship, work on yours or get out & say BYE. If you want to do good in the world, then do good. Opportunities don’t just fall from the sky, you gotta make it happen.

11. START WITH A SMALL IDEA, ZONE IN ON IT, & BECOME REALLY, REALLY GOOD AT THAT IDEA…TO LEAD TO BIGGER OPPORTUNITIES.

Instead of thinking big/BIG/BIGGGG, think small & grow outward like an upside down triangle. Remember “If you chase two rabbits, you won’t catch either one.” I always try to focus in on the niche & expand outward.

12. THERE’S NEVER A “RIGHT” TIME FOR ANYTHING.

Book the trip, ask him/her out, create that project, try that recipe, send that application, launch the business — and most importantly, live on purpose. Just do it.

13. DO THINGS OUTSIDE YOUR COMFORT ZONE.

It keeps you feeling alive. Even if it doesn’t work out quite as you’d hoped, you’re always the better person for it. Life should be about occasionally taking risks.

Not necessarily crazy, stupid, death-defying ones, just steps of varying size towards an end goal.

That end goal? To enrich your life. To fill it with people you want to spend time with. To learn new skills. To help someone else achieve something. To see new places and have new experiences.

14.THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS FAIR OR UNFAIR.

Things are what they are. I keep the words ‘fair’ and ‘unfair’ out of my vocabulary. You make your own life, your own destiny, & your own future. You can get what you can get, or you don’t. Life isn’t fair or unfair, unless you cultivate that— focus on moving forward & don’t worry about what other people are doing…remember to “stay in your own lane!”

15. YOU NEVER KNOW…

Oh geez. Don’t judge until you’ve walked in someone’s shoes. People assume they know everything about me because a lot of my interests are documented through social media. Or probably because of some things they have heard. They don’t. In fact, they don’t know 80% of my life. I have had MANY bumps in the road. MANY. No one has seen my struggles, & that’s ok with me but to judge without knowing isn’t logical. Life online looks flawless, blessed, & glamourous. Don’t judge a book by its cover because you never know. No one likes a Judge Judy anyway.

16. BEEN AN ASSHOLE GETS YOU NOWHERE. BE NICE.

We’ve all been there. I had a moment where I was in the Supermarket a few months back. I was grumpy, irritable, & annoyed at something going on at work. When I got to the counter, I snapped at the lady working because she was taking a long time. Immediately I regretted it and guilt consumed my whole body…so I apoligized sincerely. I still go to that Supermarket & now we’ve become friendly.

Been a bitch is nasty.

Smile, be gracious, be kind, be courteous & be humble. Even God exalts the humble, not the proud. Don’t be a bitter person. Celebrate wins of others, don’t envy. Love truly, not hypocritically.

17. YOU HAVE TO LEARN TO CHOOSE YOUR THOUGHTS.

Just like you choose your clothing every day. Pick the right and needful staples in the wardrobe of your heart. Thoughts are like seeds, it thrives once you nuture it. Good ones are healthy, negative ones can kill, steal your joy and destroy your inner peace.

18. WORRYING IS LIKE A ROCKING CHAIR, IT GETS YOU NOWHERE.

Worrying is pointless. Pointless. What’s the point of worrying? Whenever I start worrying about something I cannot control, I shift my focus. Life is going to flow how it flows.

19. IT WILL ALL BE OKAY!

I know that sounds a little cliché; but trust me when I say it will! Your patience, pain, time and persistence will be worth it. You need to have faith and be optimistic.

The faith that you know that thing is not there presently, but it will be there soon.

I can’t explain how or why, but I can tell you that you’ll wake up one day and feel that long-forgotten inner peace — and see that it all starts to calm down. Trust the process.

And lastly,

20.GRATITUDE WILL GET YOU THROUGH IT.

Be grateful for your little beginnings. Don’t even dare to compare yourself to anyone. Don’t be convetous! “Dey your lane and shey jeje.”

I’m grateful for all the things entering my life — and I’m finding a way to be grateful for all that has left. I’m grateful for family, friends, growth and my little infinities!

I’m grateful that this this year I was vulnerable enough to open up with and connect with many of you on a deeper level.

Dearest readers, followers, subscribers – my online friends. Been able to share my passions and interests with you, even via the internet, has brought me so much joy and fulfillment. I wake up everyday thinking of what content I can create, what pictures to share or videos to film so that you have new details from me all the time.

I’m grateful that this year I inspired some of you. I’m grateful that this year I re-inspired myself. I’m grateful for how far God has brought me! I can’t count it all. God has been really really faithful.

Obviously, this is a list of things that I need to work on daily because I’m not perfect by any means & need daily reminders. Really, it just kind of helps to write these reminders down!

I’m not preaching, just sharing…again, do what works for you!

What would you add to this?

Endlessly grateful to you all.

For your visits, presence, love, comments, shares, feedback and unwavering support and your thoughtful birthday messages.

Cheers to the next 365… Together.

Off to celebrate and to create some magic! Have some chilled champagne for me guys!

Love you!

x Omodolapo